I started this blog to share information about my life with Cystic Fibrosis. I have tried to be as honest as I can with every aspect of the disease and how it affects my life. This blog has really been a place for me to reflect on my disease, in addition to sharing information with others. There has been one topic, however, that has previously been off-limits: having children. I was never really comfortable discussing the topic out here in the open. But, I have decided to take the step forward to share the whole truth about my life with CF.
Having CF and making a decision about having children is complicated. I have so much more to consider than the average person. Pregnancy can cause complications with CF, including increased infections during pregnancy. The options for treatment are limited while pregnant. Am I willing to risk not being treated for an infection while pregnant? Am I willing to risk the long-term consequences this will have on my lungs? Am I willing to pass this gene on to my offspring? Am I willing to risk having an child with CF? Once the child is born, will I be able to continue all of my treatments, including exercise, while taking care of a baby? At what point will I be to sick to care of a child? Its a lot to take on.
On top of all of this, CF can cause complications with being able to conceive. So, even if I could find answers to all of the questions above and feel completely confident about having a baby, CF may have the final say. Which I have learned to be true for me. The honest truth, I cannot have children because of this disease.
There are a lot of options out there for women and men with CF who want to have children. There are various forms of fertility treatments and options that have helped a lot of CF women or CF wives conceive children and have successful pregnancies. Ethan and I discussed every option under the sun. Fertility treatments are not the right fit for us.
But not hope is lost. Yes, I have officially declared I cannot have children naturally. I am comfortable with this. And honestly, it feels good just to admit it and move on. There is no more disappointment. The good news is, Ethan and I have decided to pursue adoption. We are in the very early stages and it will be a very long road, but we are excited at the opportunity to become parents. Our wish right now is for a toddler in need of a good, safe and loving home.
I am not planning on writing much about our adoption journey on this blog. In the future I may decided to e-mail interested friends and family updates from time to time. But for right now, we are just going through the application, interviews, home study, and a class. We won't be approved for adoption until the later part of the year. So until then, there won't be that much to update.